I've Found You
by SeeMyEvil
Summary: It's thirty years on from when Edward left Bella, then he turns up on her doorstep. How will she react?
1. I've Found You

**I've Found You**

The doorbell rang at our new house in San Francisco, fourteen hour's drive from Forks. I had moved here from the University in Alaska; having graduated and met one man who could almost completely fill the hole in my chest that Edward had made. And this man's name was Tom, he was from Wales given the place there because he opted for it - preferred the cold to the rain he had said. But that hole is still there, heck it almost kills me every time I wake up and find the two stone arms aren't wrapped around my waist. Edward had told me time would heal my wounds, and was right, I was better though incomplete. And I was fourty-eight, going a bit wrinkly but doing a lot better in my old age than others were.

Finally walking round from the kitchen I swiftly removed my apron that I used whenever I would do some cleaning. "Just a minute!" I called, it would be rude to keep my visitor waiting. "Shame Tom is abroad" I murmured to myself. I stumbled over to the front door and opened. Staring at this man's feet covered by loafers, I slowly guided my gaze upwards. He wore black jeans that were tight in just the right places, his grey turtle-neck top stretched across his well toned physique. I stopped breathing when I saw the skin, whiter than white, like Edward's and like all the Cullens. I had left them behind! Why had one come back? I stared into his face, the topaz coloured eyes were wide with shock, his bronzy hair was in it's usual disarray and his perfect featues were arranged so that I could fully understand how happy but surprised he was to find me. I stood agape.

"I found you" he whispered, his velvety voice rocked through my body as I collapsed onto the floor. My tears began to flow and soon his arms were wrapped around me.

"_No!_ This isn't fair!" I cried. When I left Forks I only told Charlie where I was going, to Renee. I lived with her for a few months then went to Alaska, careful not to go anywhere near Denali. I lived with a broken heart for two years! Did he have any idea how painful that was?! I shook in Edward's arms, squirming away from him. I turned to see his face, he was hurt by my actions. Well guess what, _so was I_. He left me! Taking anything that might remind me of him, with him. _It will be as if I'd never existed_, he had claimed. The change on me was irreversible, a mark on my life forever. I was old, he had missed his chance. "No, Edward" he let me free. "I'm old, I have a husband, you missed your chance years ago" I looked at the floor, I couldn't bear to see his pained face any longer.

"You've changed" he whispered.

"It's what people do, Edward" I replied venomously.

"Why did it take me so long to find you?" he asked, _was it that hard to figure out_?

"Why do you think Edward?!" I screamed, walking quickly to the kitchen - my sanctuary - I picked up my apron from it's hanger and put it on. Then I began to scrub the worktop with a dishcloth. Edward followed, taking a seat in the high chair where I had eaten breakfast this morning. "I mean, did you expect me to just sit in my rocking chair back at Charlie's house for the rest of my god forsaken life?!" I scrubbed harder, wishing the surface was a punchbag. This was a shock to me, I was never violent. I stopped abruptly.

"Yes" he had answered, "in part" he was speaking to himself more than anyone else.

"_What_?" I breathed. As another round of furious, pure anger swept through me again. I had to do something to release it, or I might actually punch someone. "What did the _other _part expect Edward?" I asked.

"For you to move on, or so I'd hoped" his voice was a whisper, why so quiet?

"'A clean break'" I recalled. "Ha!" I laughed at how absurd he was, his head looked up at my sudden outburst, a confused expression on his face. I cocked my head and raised an eyebrow. "Did you really expect I could forget you, _get on with life_?" my voice was disbelieving and heavily indignant, I made sure my face matched.

"I knew it would be difficult, but you're human, you're strong" he explained in a stutter. My eyes widened.

"I'm strong?" I was confused, _strong_? You sure you got the right person here?

"Yes, you're magnificent Bella, so much stronger than me, you've survived" he looked up briefly than turned away once more.

"_I've survived_" I sighed, " How wrong you are" I stared out the window, suddenly interested in the wind blowing the parasol around in our back garden.

"Wrong?" he questioned in a whimper.

"Yes, completely and totally wrong" I replied brokenly, the hole in my chest had ripped open again, wide open. It was stinging, a pressure on my heart, tearing me apart internally.

"How?" he breathed, he took another unecessary breath afterwards.

"Can't you see the pain I'm in?! Every day I wake up and you're not there! I've grown old without you, I'm supposed to be eightteen forever with you!" my hand found itself pressing against my torso, I was crumbling and fell to the floor pressed into the cupboards. "Look at me" I held up my free hand to him, it was slightly wrinkled and my skin was chapped. All the tell tale signs of old age. "Tom will never fill your hole! He tries but he won't ever, ever be you" my voice became smaller as I spoke on, reducing down so that I couldn't barely hear it. I had closed my eyes and bitten my lip, trying to hold back the inevitable tears that would fall. "Never you" I whispered. I covered my face with my knees and arms as I crawled into the fetal position.

"I'm sorry, Bella!" Edward shouted, distraught. I did not respond, Edward came to sit beside me and put his cold hand on my bare foot. I flinched away from his cold touch. "Look at me Bella" he put a hand on my arm and lightly tugged on it. "Please, it's all I ask" he whispered. I lifted my head, my eyes red raw and nose running. My vision was blurred from the tears that still harboured in my tear ducts, ready to spill over when something wrong was said. Why was he here? He didn't love me, and had apparently been searching.

"Why are you here?" my words were slurred from the increase in saliva in my mouth. Edward winced.

"Because I love you, Bella" I began to cry again, Edward wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"Why do you lie, Edward?" I questioned. He pulled back to look at my face. "Why do you say you love me?" I elaborated. "Why? If this is some kind of sick joke-"

"I lied to you when I claimed I didn't love you, but I'm not lying to you now Bella, I promise" I pushed away from him, but he kept a firm hold on my hand.

"Edwar-" I could not finish my sentence because he had pulled me to the floor with him and crushed his lips against mine. I fell into the kiss like I used to, becoming overly enthusiastic. It felt like fireworks, what I had wanted to do for thirty years, one difference - I was old. I broke the kiss and Edward frowned. It wasn't the same. This was terrible, this was sick.

"Stop it" I exclaimed. "You should leave Edward, I'm too old for this now" I walked to the wedding photo that Tom had hung in the front room, we had married in 2010. I took it from the wall and went to show it to Edward. He was still sat on the floor by the cupboards, his head rolled back so he was looking at the ceiling. "This is my wedding day Edward" I walked till I stood straight above him, handing him the frame. He took it eagerly, studying everything about it. A traditional shot, I walked down the chapel stairs with Tom while the crowd threw rice.

"Tom's very handsome" he commented. _He ain't got nothing on you_. I mentally noted. "But he pales next to your beauty Bella" Edward continued. I blushed. "Are you happy?" Edward looked into my eyes.

"More or less" I however, looked away.

"More or less?" he inquired.

"I haven't been okay since my eighteenth birthday, Edward" was my answer, he put his head down closing his eyes. As though he were in great pain. "I'm good at repressing unpleasant feelings, apart from in the mornings, that's out of my control though" the last part was an afterthought. "How is everyone else?"

"Not so good, especially not Jasper" he stared suggestively at me, as if I were the cause.

"That is a shame" I stated. "Send them to my door whenever" I added.

"I can't let you go again Bella"

"And I don't want you to go, but I need you to leave, _for me_" I caressed his cheek, he pressed into my hand breathing in. He finally got up, he put a hand behind my neck and we kissed. Was this truly goodbye? All too soon, he pulled away, there was an unnatural wind which was painfully familiar. I opened my eyes, I saw no-one. He was gone.

**A/N: I hope you liked this one shot, I'm certainly proud of it. ;) Love ya peeps!**


	2. My Person

**My Person**

I wandered over to the front door in a daze, it was closed. As if he had never arrived. My breathing returned to normal despite the weight in my chest; the hole had ripped itself open, history was repeating itself. Why this moment in my past? It tore me apart like it did thirty years ago. I had to stop myself becoming emotionally numb, what would Tom think? I rushed to the kitchen remembering the wedding photo, I stroked his face, he had been so happy that day yet all I could do was wish I was taking the name Cullen. Not Murphy. My eyes had sweeped the crowd for a flash of his coppery hair. You could tell who had driven the wedding just by seeing our expressions in the photograph.

How long until Tom gets home? I made my way over to the calender beside the front door on the wall, it was September, another stab of pain shot through my body. He was due back on the 10th, being the day after tomorrow. I picked up the Yellow Pages from the small table underneath the calender.

"C, c, c, c, _shit_" I had sliced my finger on the corner of the page, I put it in my mouth and sucked, continuing my search. "C - U" I stuttered, the sting in my finger was still present but I ignored it, I had suffered worse. I looked to the crescent-shaped scar on my hand, then turned back to the pages, "CULLEN!" I shrieked in excitement I bounced on the balls of my feet. Punching in the number onto the pad on the phone frantically. Then I stopped. What exactly would I do if I found them? Live with them and leave Tom? Becoming a vampire would never happen. Have in affair with Edward? Now I had plenty to lose, if had Edward decided he loved me twenty-eight years ago then we might have had a chance. My household is stable, Tom loves me. What more could I get out of life? _To actually have your love in your life_, the voice said. That would be selfish, I argued, Tom deserves happiness and that is what I give him. _Put yourself first for once_ it rebuked. Just shut up, I'm going to stay put, whether you like it or not!

"God, this is crazy! I'm arguing with my mind" I rubbed my temples with my fingers - the bleeding had stopped. I jerked when the stinging came back, I went to the first aid kit in the kitchen cupboard and retrieved a plaster. Covering it, I wondered why a broken heart couldn't be fixed like that, just stitch it up or something. Why did we all have to go through this terrible, emotional, stabbing pain? On one hand I just couldn't bear to leave Tom, I would feel awful forever, guilt would take me over and I'd find myself on his doorstep in a few years time begging for forgiveness. And on the other hand, I wanted Edward, I had always wanted him and I truly loved him. But, it wouldn't be the same, I'm old enough to be his mother, I would grow old and die - with him staying the stunning, dazzling seventeen year old. Argh! There was _no_ reasoning. I needed to talk to Angela, she is my person, I tell her everything, she usually determines things for me. I only wish I could speak to her face-to-face, she now lived in New York with a boy that she met at university, like me. Jason White, she married him in 2012, he insisted on sharing the year with the London Olympics. She had two girls, Hannah is in her twenties and Julie in her teens - really sweet kids, she raised them well. I picked up the phone and dialled that very familiar number, she answered after five rings.

"Hello?" Angela asked.

"It's Bella" I replied.

"Oh, hey Bells! How you doing?"

"Not so great"

"What's up?" her voice turned to concern. But I could almost see her rolling her eyes, I've called with problems a lot over the years.

"Edward came back" I breathed, there was silence at the other for a moment.

"What's the problem then? That's good news, right?" she was busy, I could tell, hoping for an easy dismissal.

"You're busy aren't you, sorry" I spoke quickly, guilty for disturbing her.

"No, no Bella, I'm not busy" she hushed me. "So, why is this bad?"

"I wanna go back to him, but I can't leave Tom! I couldn't bear it, he's been so good to me" I babbled.

"Hey, hey, Bella, calm down" I took a shaky breath and blew out. "Better?"

"Uhuh, sorry"

"In my opinion, you should do what your heart says, oh heck that sounds really corny" I laughed, it _did _sound corny.

"Thanks Ange, you rock" I smiled, she always cheered me up without even trying, my best friend.

"I know" she replied, bringing on another round of giggles.

"I've decided what to do now" I confided, she paused. "Anglela?"

"Go on"

"I'm going to find Edward" I said, sighing.

"Sure?"

"Not really, but-"

"You need to be sure, Bella" she was stern.  
"Okay, I'm sure"

"Now, I am busy, so you have to go"

"Okay" I answered, overlooking the fact that I had asked earlier and she told me she wasn't.

"Bye, loadsalove"

"Ditto" I put the phone back on it's reciever and rung the Cullen name in the Yellow Pages. However, answerphone picked up - with Carlisle's voice!

"Hello, you have reached the home of the Cullens, but I don't know how you got the number-" laughs "- so please leave a message with your name, the date and time and then your number" It beeped for what seemed like an eternity.

"It's Bella! I can't believe you left your number in the Yellow Pages, I've made a mistake Edward, I'm sorry! Please come back" I stuttered desperately. "It's the 8th of September and it is half past three" I then pressed the end call button and set the phone down on the receiver. I began to bite my nails for nerves, I paced up and down the hallway. _Right, left, right, left._ I reminded myself, over the years my balance had improved by miles but at times like this my concentration tended to fall to my feet.

In the background there was a shrill ring, it came from the table under the calender, I noticed that the phone was vibrating. I stared at the clock, it read four o'clock - how long had I just walked in a blanket of crazy thoughts? Thoughts that wouldn't register at the surface...half an hour. Comprehending that the phone was ringing I scrambled for it, is it Edward?

"Hello?" I asked breathlessly.

"Bella" her soft voice sighed.

"Esme!" I cried. "I've missed you all"

"We have too" she confessed, the weight in my chest lifted, only for a while I'd bet though.

"You got my message?"

"Yes, the rest of us just got back from hunting" Esme stopped "Edward got a lead and went to a house, seems like he found you"

"I told him to leave"

"That would explain why he isn't here then" my heart felt as though it weighed two tonnes, I gasped. "Are you okay Bella?"

"Mhmm" I swallowed.

"Do you want to come around?" she asked in a kindly tone that I could never refuse.

"Yes please"

"Maybe Edward will get here soon" I think she was speaking to herself. "See you soon Bella dear, I think our address is with our number in the Pages" I looked back at the massive book and sure enough, there it was.

"Yep, it's here" She hung up.

**A/N: You asked for more and I gave in, plus I like this story too much, I'll put my energies into this for a while. :D Please Review!**


	3. The End

**The End**

I headed to the bathroom and watching myself in the mirror, I put on my mascara and rubbed on some lip gloss. Satisfied that I looked presentable after a few minutes of primping, I went downstairs and shoved on my sneakers. Grabbing the car keys from the table by the door I then ripped out the Cullen's address from the Pages, soon I was inside my Audi and pulling out of the drive. I stopped on the side of the road to check the shred of paper that might lead me into a new life, I did a double take.

"They're on the other side of the city?!" I exclaimed. "Ah!" Hell, I haven't got enough gas for a trip that long. I sighed, "Just when I actually need my super flashy car" I pressed my foot down, I'd have to pay a visit to Larry's, he's a nice man but his wife died a few years ago so he's very lonely. The houses flew by until they became tower blocks and skyscrapers. Larry's station was just about in the middle of San Francisco, an unusual placement to me. I reached it ten minutes later; it pays when you know little rat runs. You just need to know where to look. The second I stepped out of my car, I felt as though I was being watched, I felt like I was in danger. I looked all around me but I was the only one here besides the kid behind the counter inside. I walked round and filled my tank, I sifted my vision from left to right at swift intervals nervously. Once I got inside the shop I went to the counter, the spotty, ginger boy there was obviously new.

"Nice day?" he asked as he fumbled over the keys on the cash register.

"Not really" I replied dryly, pulling my wallet out of my jeans pocket. I think he was about to ask why but I think my glare halted him. My card worked and I took it back before walking outside again to my car. There was that watched feeling, a presence that caused me to feel uneasy but safe. I settled into my seat and drove off, in the rearview mirror was a bright light, I had to close my eyes momentarily, when I did open my eyes I still could not see and this was all it took for me to realise that I was going to crash into a pillar that was supporting the freeway above. I got my sight back, probably due to the adrenilin pumping through me at a mile a millisecond. I saw a woman, reaching out to her son so that she could swivel him away from the crash, a boy that young should not have to see this horrific accident. I think, from shock or fright, I passed out...why should I have to be awake to feel death? The end?

**Edward's POV**

I came back to Bella's house after a run, to cool off my temper. I had searched heaven and hell to find her, I finally find her and she wants me to go away. I will not leave her, no matter how much she wants me to. She strode out of the house and climbed into her car, I was almost surpised that she didn't still have the dishevelled Chevy. She pulled out at a pace that was so fast I couldn't barely catch it, wait, it's just quick for Bella. "They're on the other side of the city?!" her beautifully enraged voice questioned, "ah!" my sight was limited by the tinted windows on the car. What had made her so angry? "Just when I actually need my super flashy car" she murmured, I stifled a very loud laugh, she hadn't changed that much then. I just can't get over how much she has changed! Her face was now painted with make-up, her hair had been straightened, her scent was even different. Now tainted with alcohol and anti-depressants. It then struck me, I was the reason that she was depressed - happy Bella was gone. Yet I still loved her. I turned my head to the head, the Audi was gone. _Damnit_. I took off running, following her new smell not as appealing to me anymore. I had to dive into the alleys when a pedestrian would come up, which got frustrating. If only I could read her thoughts! This would be so much easier. I reached the old station where she had parked, she was inside the shop, so I waited behind a pump. There was a strange smell here, vampiric, someone I had not met before clearly. Whoever it was had left a few moments ago. Bella walked out of the shop, her body rigid she reached her car and drove out. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted the vampire that had been here walk into the sunlight just behind Bella, her car wove around the road for a while, she was going to drive into the freeway! I acted before I could think, I ran at a speed I didn't realise I was capable of but yet, the car rammed into the pillar, the car concertinad and the smell of her blood hit me like a tonne of bricks. I had to stop breathing. Right now all that mattered was Bella's well being, who cares about the other vampire?! I pulled the car apart so that I could get to Bella, I took her out of the wreckage. She was unconscious but breathing, shallowly. I had to get her to Carlisle, she _had_ to survive this. Be it she were a vampire or not, I was far too selfish to let her go like that. I flew through the crowds of SF, they probably didn't even see me, just felt the wind.

**A/N: Sorry that this chapter is so short, but I didn't see how I could continue this part in the same piece. Here's a quiz:  
When you saw the chapter title did you think I was finishing the story?  
Please leave your theories on what is happening in the next chapter in a REVIEW! lol**

Alice x


	4. Fate

**Fate**

**Edward's POV**

"I'm sorry Edward, there is _no_ other way" Carlisle told me, I kept looking at my beautiful Bella, a bloody cut on her forehead that would kill her, plus multiple bruises all over her body. Her leg was broken and her right arm fractured. Why hadn't I stopped this?! Carlisle put a hand on my shoulder, "Edward" he prompted. My internal questioning went on, ignoring him. Why hadn't Alice seen this?! Who was the vampire that had done this to her? Why can't she be saved? Who would want this for her? It is pure evil. "I'm going to save her, Edward"

"_Save her?_" I whirled around.

"Unless you want her death" Carlisle's words were harsh, he was obviously irritated.

"Edward" I hadn't even noticed Esme walk into the room, she stood in the doorway of my room. "She left a message, she was coming to see us when she...crashed" Esme struggled over her words once she saw the pain flicker into my eyes.

"What was the message?" I asked.

"Go listen to it, it's on the answer phone machine" I looked back to my love. "Bella has some time" Everything was so calm...why weren't they flying around the house like maniacs? On edge? I needed a distraction, whatever was on this message would determine her fate. I ran down the stairs past the concerned faces of my siblings. Weren't they bothered that Bella was clinging onto life by a hair's breadth? I tapped the button on the phone, her message played. "It's Bella! I can't believe you left your number in the Yellow Pages, I've made a mistake Edward, I'm sorry! Please come back... It's the 8th of September and it is half past three" I stood there dumbstruck, she was coming back. _She was coming back_.

**Bella's POV**

I felt like I was flying, nothing was real. Suddenly, I was in a frightening darkness, I looked up and the sky was in twilight; the safest time of day for vampires. I began to walk forward, pointlessly. Where was I to go? Where was I even? I spun around at the crackle of a branch snapping. "Who's there?" I asked in a panicky shriek. Where had that come from?! You're safe, Edward will come for you. This thought calmed me some, but my heart was still beating ten to the dozen.

"Bella" someone called, the boy sounded familiar. From a long time ago though..."BELLA!" a girl called now.

"_What_?!" I screamed.

"Run!" a man came from nowhere, again a familiar voice and face but I couldn't place it.

"Why?" I asked defiantly.

"They're coming" I don't know why but those words were enough to make me run miles. _Who's coming_? I started out at a spint, the black never ended and once I had run like that for at least ten minutes I had to stop to take a breath. My muscles regained feeling and comfort, why run anymore? I laid down, staring at the sky, there were small points of light - stars. I watched a comet shoot out and everything was bright, I could see where I was. There were trees all around, my breath caught in my throat when I saw that I was just at the end of Charlie's lawn, just inside the forest. I began to cry, because only seconds later I was in the darkness and when I looked into the sky there were no stars. My comet had gone. No meaning in my life once more. I felt a sharp pinch in my neck. A whimper escaped my mouth as my body was set alight, this physical pain was _nothing_ compared to the emptiness I had plunged into now. I rocked against a tree, perhaps this fire would kill me? Release me.

**A/N: Sorry! It's super short, but this for the same reason as last chapter. Next one will be longer, I promise. :) Trust in _me._ Who do you think the man in the forest was? _Hmmm_? REVIEW!**


	5. Fatty

**Fatty**

I opened my eyes, a ceiling? Where's the sky?! "Huh?" I mumbled. One pale hand came to check my forehead, the other held my hand. I twisted my head to see who these hands belonged to, Carlisle...I sat bolt upright and examined the room. To the left there was a wall full of CDs, by the bed was a window though I could not see through it, a wardrobe staight ahead from the bed and a door to the right. The walls were painted black. Something wasn't right, in fact a lot of things weren't right. Carlisle's hands should have been cold. I wasn't breathing yet my chest wasn't begging. I could not hear the blood running through my body. I felt cold myself. I put my left hand to where my heart would be beating, not a murmur - silent. I screamed.

"Bella, shh shh, it's okay" Carlisle tried to comfort me but...I am _dead_! I curled into a ball, whimpering quietly. "I know what you need" he whispered and left the room. I breathed heavily, wanting to cry desperately but no tears would come. I clung to my t-shirt waiting for my heart to pump blood around my body again, somehow. _Wasn't this what I wanted though?_ THIRTY YEARS AGO! And what about Tom?! He'll be going out of his mind with worry, I've left him. I meant to at least explain before I went...Emmett walked in carrying a deer, it's scent was luscious and I craved it. I curled in on myself even more, determined not to lose to the monster within.

"_No_" I told myself.

"You have to feed Bella" Emmett's serious tone threw me off, I turned my head towards him but towards the deer aswell. I couldn't stop myself, I had sunk my teeth into it's neck while he watched happily. Once I had finished I returned to the bed, lying my head on the pillow. Maybe sleep would save me? I heard Emmett leave and Carlisle come back in.

"Better?" he asked.

"Somewhat" I mumbled into the pillow.

"Do you want a reminder of how we are?" Carlisle's voice seemed patronizing.

"No" I shut my eyes like a stubborn kid.

"You'll remember that sleep is impossible then" he said chuckling under his breath.

"_Crap_" I sat up. Carlisle was smiling. "Where's Edward?"

"Downstairs, he's really upset about this though" he had gone into doctor sincerity mode. I smiled shyly.

"What has been happening up till now?"

"We've lived in every state of the US on Edward's word" my eyes widened, "searching for you" he gestured towards me with his hand.

"Sorry"

"What have you got to be sorry for?"

"I'm responsible for your own inconvenience" I twiddled my thumbs nervously.

"Why did you run Bella?" my head switched upwards, he was so forward. He deserves an answer...

"Once I finally came to terms with the fact that Edward didn't love me and that he was never coming back, I needed to be away from that place" I paused, "Imagine Esme telling you she didn't love you and left" I made sure that I had eye contact. "A broken heart for thirty years" I mouthed. Carlisle took my left hand.

"He does love you" he looked down onto the golden band around my third finger.

"Yes, I was married" I sighed, "his name was Tom, he almost filled Edward's place - made me feel a little bit better"

"Oh, Bella, Edward has been a fool" he chuckled, I laughed some too.

"Well, he finally found me" I smiled grimly and stood up, my clothes sagged horrificly. "What's happened?!" I exclaimed, cue _Alice_.

"Well, it seems like you were quite a fatty in your old age, something vampirism can fix" she winked.

"Bitch" I mumbled.

"I heard that Isabella!" she squeaked. I grinned innocently, willing for a halo to appear above my head. "No halo can save you, girl. Give me ten!" she shrieked. I dropped to my knees with indigntion, knowing there was no point in arguing. I performed ten press-ups and jumped to my feet once more. "Well done" she clapped her hands excitedly.

"So, can I change?" I practically begged.

"Come with me" she took my hand and dragged me along the corridor to a door with _Alice and Jasper _written on a sign in fancy lettering. Jasper greeted me with a nod of the head, Alice persisted with her dragging into the walk-in wardrobe. Alice told me to stay by the door while she ran to the very back, soon returning with a white, floaty dress.

"Put it on" she commanded, I rolled my eyes but removed every item of clothing I had on and replaced it.

"Shoes?" I asked.

"You don't need them right now" _Huh?_

"Where's Alice you imposter?!" I joked.

"You won't be leaving the house for _weeks_" she replied, my jaw dropped.

"You expect me to stay cooped up inside this house for _weeks_? I get claustrophobic!"

"You'll get over it" I humphed.

"Thanks for the dress" I shouted over my shoulder as I stepped into the hall.

**A/N: Two chapters in a day! Go me! lol ;) Yes it is short, but longer than the last. I'm stuck so, I hope you enjoyed what I _have_ written. And don't forget to REVIEW!**


	6. Eighteen Years Younger

**Eighteen Years Younger**

Just by the stairs was Carlisle's old cross that I had marvelled the first time I visited the Cullens. How old? I looked into my memories to find out, but it was just blank. I sighed and waved it off, wasn't that important really anyway. I took a single step downstairs and everything going on there was immeadiately audiable, I smirked and ran to the bottom. Everything was in perfect definition as I sped to an inhuman pace. I hit somone when I turned left knocking me and them over.

"Sorry" I murmured.

"No problem" someone replied, I looked at this strange boy. He was in his late teens I'd say, with brown, wavy hair his features were boring yet I felt as though he had as much depth as the Pacific Ocean.

"Who are you?" I asked bluntly, quite rudely aswell but right now I didn't really care.

"Peter" he held out his hand for me to shake and I took it.

"How comes you're here?" I straightened out my hair from the fall.

"I knew Jasper" Peter smiled. I didn't know much about Jasper's past, what harm could it do to ask how he knew him?

"Oh? How?"

"Has he not told you of his past?" his voice was thick with surprise and his face showed it too. I shook my head. "I better respect his privacy then" he winked then walked away. I shook my head and walked on into the kitchen, Rosalie was there with Edward leaning on the counters facing each other. I stopped.

"You changed her, you deal with it" Rosalie hissed.

"I am dealing with it" Edward almost growled.

"Why are you here then?"

There was a long pause. Edward came in my direction and then sped to stand in front of me. He just looked at me.

"Hi" I wimpered, worried that he was angry with me for eavesdropping. He took me into his arms and kissed my head countless times, I hugged him back. The best place in the world.

"I've missed you" Edward whispered.

"Not half as much as I have" he left and I walked to the living room where Esme had called me to. I sat on the white leather couch beside her.

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine, thank you Esme" My eyes still roamed around the room continuously not really paying attention to what I saw.

"Edward was an empty shell without you" she mused.

"I was under the illusion that he never loved me for thirty years" Esme winced but I didn't feel guilty. With age I had grown bitter. In fact, I haven't seen my new body yet. I stood and ran to the nearest mirror. I gasped. "_No way_!" I screamed. My body was slender and well toned, every wrinkle I ever had smoothed out, my hair had lost it's grey roots and the new, sleek brown looked amazing. With these differences I looked thirty again. I wanted to cry in this moment. I cupped my face in my hands. "No way"

"Yes, way" said the little pixie as she stood with me. "You better believe it" she smiled smugly as if she had known this would happen the whole time. Oh! She probably had too. I ran my hands through my hair and felt down to my hips. I smiled into the mirror, Alice had gone again. I sunk to the floor, not really knowing what to do with myself, I thought of Tom and a great ache suddenly existed in my chest but still not as bad as once before. I had to see him.

**A/N: Sorry for the delay and sorry for the short length, but I'm at writer's block right now...so. Well, REVIEW! You might inspire me.**


	7. Me thinksAN

**Me thinks...**

I think I'm gonna have to take a break from writing for a while, 3 reasons:

**1# **I'm going on holiday for two weeks and then after another week I'm going again.

**2# **I have hit a major writer's block.

**3# **Breaking Dawn is going to be in my hands in 22 days!

I hope you'll understand, I mean it I am completely stuck. Really sorry guys! When I'm back my mind will be refreshed and rearing to go, just 4 weeks. :( You have been awesome reviewers, love y'all!

**seemyevil**


	8. What's wrong?

**What's wrong?**

I rushed out of the door into a wooded area. "What the hell?! There's no big forests in San Francisco!" I huffed and carried on running, maybe I'd come to a road in fact I'd have to meet a road sometime. The air around me was still until I ploughed through it at a very inhuman speed, I now knew why Edward loved to run so much, it's so exhilerating! A tree appeared in front of me, my eyes widened and I dodged it right into another tree. "Ow!" I grumbled, where'd that come from?! The tree crackled and I saw it snap in half, this fir tree had been weak. "I guess I hurt you more than you hurt me, tree" I taunted the log. You're going mad Bella! Talking to _trees_. My face ached for a little while as I ran once more; I heard a lorry about a mile away and before I knew it I was there with it. "Heck, this speed is fantastic!"

"I know" I felt Edward's arms wrap around my waist and take me back into the forest, I struggled for what seemed like hours with him. His breathing was even and I was reminded of our first "date" I suppose, he ran back from the meadow with me gripping onto his back for fear of my life! I laughed internally but was greeted with further reminder of Tom - our first date, he took me to the cinema. What was it that we saw? I couldn't remember.

"What were you thinking of?!" I found that I had been set on my feet and was standing in the room I had woken in, staring into Edward's enraged eyes. I looked questioningly towards Alice whom sat on the bed behind him. Edward shook me, forcing my attention upon him again. "Bella!" he shouted, getting frustrated. I stared ahead blankly, not really seeing. I wanted to answer him, but I couldn't will my muscles to do anything. I heard clicking sounds beside my right ear, all I could do was close my eyes.

**Edward's POV**

Bella was completely still, Alice made her way over and clicked her fingers in Bella's ear. She shut her eyes, her angelic face showed no signs of life and nor did her body. I reached out for her hand but was met with a shock that brought me to my knees.

"Damnit" I hissed under my breath. Alice's little boot hit my back.

"I'm getting Carlisle" I saw a twitch in Bella's eyelid, just for a split second.

**Bella's POV**

I didn't fully understand what was happening right now, the only word I could bring from my locked up mind was _safe_. Then this next moment I was sitting beside Edward in our meadow, the sun glittering off his perfect skin, I couldn't _not _be happy while experiencing that time again. Watching this again, more like a good reel of film but with no sound. The day in the meadow played five times before I felt any kind of control coming back into my muscles. I pushed my eyes open into slits, Carlisle stared back with panicked eyes.

"Bella?!" Edward came forward to stand in front of Carlisle. I wanted to reach out and hug him, I wanted to tell him I was okay and ask why he had been so scared. I stared into his worry-filled eyes. "What's wrong with her?!" he asked

"I don't know Edward" he replied quickly. The doctor glanced at Edward then looked back at me, he took two careful, measured steps towards me and stopped. His expression was puzzled. "Blink if you can hear me"

I blinked. It was all I could do right now. Carlisle smiled.

"Blink if you can't move"

I blinked.

"Blink if you know why"

I stared forward.

"Can you still hear me?"

I blinked.

"Do you need us to leave you?"

I paused before my eyes closed of their own accord.

"Okay, Edward we have to leave her"

"Fine"

I stepped towards his voice and reached out. Only then could I open my eyes properly.

**A/N: Thank you so much for your patience with me! I owe you. But PLEASE REVIEW!**


	9. An Irreversable Change

**An Irreversable Change**

The room was covered in words, I read one of the sentences that surrounded Carlisle. _This won't hurt a bit. _And another. _Everyting will be okay. _

"Everything will be okay" I whispered as I stared at the doctor. I turned to Edward, and picked out the most painful words he'd ever said to me. _I don't want you to come with me. _I read one more of these lines I saw in the air before me, each giving me a stabbing pain. _You're not good for me, Bella. _An old wound opened, the hole that had closed the second I saw him just the other day. I couldn't stop myself from staring these painful words, straight in the eye. I am not weak.

I desperately wished I could cry. My face scrunched up and Edward ran to me, but I put my hand out to keep him back. _The lies he'd told me! _They sickened me, I'd lived in some kind of _just_ bearable hell for years because of him. I ran from the room, pushing aside Carlisle and made my way down the stairs to Esme. The closest thing I had to a mother right now. I wound my arms around her body, I shut my eyes and sobbed into her shoulder. She wrapped her hands around my back and held my head close to her.

"Bella, what's brought this on? What happened?" she whispered in my ear, rocking me side to side gently.

"I can't explain it" I murmured. "Not at all"

"Try, please Bella" she begged, I straightened up. How could I inflict this on her? She'd done nothing wrong and it was my _own_ problem. Stupid, selfish Isabella!

"There are words surrounding everyone I see"

"Like what Bella? What do these words make up to?" gently, still so understanding.

"I don't know, all I can think of is lies...so many lies!"

I sat back on the sofa, and took calming breaths. It's not like me to get so wound up, what would Renee say? Or, Tom? Esme crouched in front of me, she was searching for a signal that I was somehow, okay. Only a few words surrounded her careful form. _I'm going away for a few days. I'll be back soon._

"I'm going away for a few days. I'll be back soon." I whispered, certainly to low for human ears, but just loud enough for her ears. "Was that a lie you told?" I asked. Esme nodded. "So that's obviously, what I'm...seeing"

"I'd think so" she smiled. Edward and Carlisle showed up behind her, their lies with them still. I had to close my eyes, Edward's were simply too painful for me.

"You hear all that?" I inquired.

"Yes" Carlisle answered. "You see lies"

I nodded.

"Be careful what you say when you're speaking to me" I smiled smugly.

"Why did you run from the room like that, Bella?"

"What lies have you told me Edward? Think about it" I exploded. My voice shook with anger and upset. Could he be so foolish?! There was a silence in the room that lasted several minutes. I concentrated on evening out my breathing again. In the end my curiosity got the better of me and I opened my eyes. Carlisle and Esme had left, the atmosphere in the room was still. The calm before the storm. I forced my eyes to meet Edward's.

Pain. Anger. Sadness. And another unreadable emotion was present there. My chest felt as though it had had been hollowed out. I wanted to say sorry, but - why should I? He'd brought this upon himself completely.

"I left you to save you, Bella. I could see what I was doing to you, taking away any possibility of a good, human life from you. I didn't want that" he began pacing around the room running his hand through his hair, mussing it up into a beautiful disarray. "I am truly sorry that it turned out this way"

"So am I" I mumbled.

"I _love _you Isabella Swan" he held my head in his hands and his sweet breath sent me into a temporary daze. He couldn't have the same affect on me as he did when I was young.

"Murphy" I corrected, to irritate him more than anything. It did the trick, he stepped away and turned his back on me. "Just like old times" I chuckled. "'Cause I _am _old Edward"

"Bella! I am just about tearing my hair out here" he growled.

"Ooooh, scary" was my snappy reply. I was not in the mood for declarations of love, could I love him? No. This was the closure I needed, he told me he didn't love me all those years ago. I could finally say the same. He had hurt me too badly.

Vampiric love, an irreversable change. I had reversed it. And so what would I do now?

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait and sorry for the chapter being so short but I couldn't end it any other way. Aren't I evil. Anybody surprised how it turned out? Please REVIEW.**


	10. Repetition

**Repetition**

"Edward" I whispered sheepishly, stepping forward so I was just inches away from his face. His eyes instantly turned towards mine, urging me to continue. "I have to leave"

"No, Bella."

"Yes, Edward" I sighed. He gripped my wrists tightly in an attempt to make me stop. He wouldn't be able to though, I would always leave.

"_No_!" he shouted defiantly, holding onto my wrists as tight as he could possibly manage. I knew then I would have to break him like he had, me.

"I don't love you anymore" I said breathlessly, how could I be so cruel? Old and bitter, more bitter than most middle-aged women but still...

Edward stared into my eyes not fully understanding for a while, "Well, that changes things." His hands dropped to his sides, he had stopped breathing aswell. My words from those years ago echoed in the room now.

"Of course, I'll always love you...in a way. But what happened that evening at the edge of the forest, you just...ruined me Edward" I stared into his eyes again and all I could see was sheer pain and shock. "I'm sorry I led you on, but I was confused..."

"Don't apologize, I don't know how I expected you to love me at all. Not with-" I covered his mouth with my forefinger.

"Stop it Edward, we're both at fault here. I'm going back to Tom now, we are going to move to somewhere in Europe, I will obviously need to change him," As I made these plans Edward's face became more incredulous. "our identities will change and I will do whatever it takes to make sure that you never find me again." I knew I was being cruel, if he felt one tenth of what I had felt for him, then I knew he would be in agony right now and I hated myself for it. "I'm sorry, but do me one favour - if it isn't too much" Edward nodded immediately. "Look after yourself" with that, I left the Cullen house.

**Fin.**

**A/N: So the tale has finished, I'm sorry it took me so long! I am _really _sorry. Writer's block, schoolwork, etc. No excuses really...  
I hope you like how it ended, all the same. There was no other way to do it. /**

**Alice  
x **


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